After spending a million dollars on school supplies...
another year has begun.
First day of school 2011
I want to record what a special, sacred and stressful experience I had a week before school started:
Lily started Kindergarten this year, and even though I WANTED to send her to half day kindergarten, our neighborhood school only offered it full day. I looked in to driving her somewhere else, but going to a different school stressed me out and I wanted her with her older siblings. That was what I was pretty much planning to do, even though she was still on the wait list at Benjamin Franklin.
Then 2 weeks before school started, one night I was feeling a little down, depressed and stressed and a little off, but I didn't know why. I decided to spend extra time on my own reading scriptures because I hate feeling out of sorts like that. While reading scriptures at 1am, I had the distinct thought that I should really consider taking Lily to Benjamin Franklin again. (Which surprised me, cuz I had really decided against it) I couldn't decide which school curriculum I liked better, and as I was laying there weighing the pros and cons, I had the distinct thought that Lily's education did not matter as much as my relationship with her. I felt it so strong that that night I made the decision that I needed to change her. I even distinctly felt I should sign her up for morning kindergarten so that she could have time with just me while Sophie napped in the afternoon. Immediately all that depression and anxiety I had been feeling all night left and I felt peace and excitement to have another year with Lily.
Now 3 years ago I sent Logan to full day Kindergarten and he loved it, and I felt no guilt about it. But Logan had gotten plenty of attention from me. We had a very special bond, we are still "snuggle buddies" to this day because of time we spent every day laying in his bed together reading books while his older siblings were at school and baby Lily napped. But poor Lily was totally jipped of that experience with me. I had so much work to do daily with our land development project last year, that daily while baby Sophie napped I would put a movie on for Lily so I could work. Our land development project is through so that this next year I will be able to have that special alone time with Lily.
The whole next week taking her out of our neighborhood school and arranging her to go to the new school for half day I was stressed about the last minute change and felt weird taking her to a different school then her siblings. I had to keep reminding myself of the feelings I had that night reading scriptures.
Now that school started last week, I am SO thankful I followed the prompting. It has been so special for me and Lily to have alone quiet time together (we snuggle in the bean bag with a blanket every day after homework to read books while Sophie naps). Sophie also gets more time to play alone with her big sister, and how priceless is that. I know with all my heart that God is real and that He will direct our lives if we always seek Him. I know that he loves each of us and He knew what was best for Lily and me. I am so thankful He loved and cared enough about our family to give me guidance that night in my room at 1am, which totally changed what I had thought we were going to do.
I know God hears and answers our prayers. I love him. It is a sacred thing to feel guidance from Diety for my own personal private decisions.
